A while back, a client shared an article about decluttering that gave her an aha moment. The article talks about the emotional component that makes it difficult to let go of things we “spent good money on” and don’t use. It says that acknowledging we “got our use out of them” reduces our guilt when we get rid of things that no longer bring us joy, and we no longer need.

This concept can also be applied to relationships that no longer serve us. Many times, we stay in relationships far beyond their usefulness because we are emotionally invested. According to the book The Likeability Factor, your personal value to others equals what you offer (benefits) minus what you require (costs). This equation also applies to other people in your life. If you are getting little value from the relationship, but it requires a lot of effort on your part, the costs outweigh the benefits, and perhaps it’s time to let it go.

It's important to give yourself permission to let go of what no longer serves you, whether it’s a physical object or a relationship. You can do this by remembering the value and usefulness it once had and the joy it used to bring and realizing that you got your use out of it. Every relationship serves a purpose. Everyone who comes into your life is a teacher to you, and you are a teacher to them. The lessons you learned and the experiences you shared served a purpose, but the relationship may no longer be adding value. When you stop holding on to what no longer serves you, you open yourself up for more people/things to come into your life that would serve you better. Give yourself the gift of letting go without guilt. 

“When things don’t add up in your life, start subtracting. Life gets a lot simpler when you clear the clutter that makes it complicated.” – Angel Chernoff 

“Letting go means to come to the realization that some people are a part of your history, but not a part of your destiny.” – Steve Maraboli

“At some point you have to realize that some people can stay in your heart but not in your life.” – Unknown

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